Hurt

Message

Spikey · #1 Post by **Spikey** » Mon Dec 20, 2004 3:48 pm

Serious people, what are those? He was so nice to me, but I've been deceived. Some of my friends saw him kissing another boy last Saturday. And he has the nerve to lie about it in my face! His sister (27) died last friday, and I've been so supportive and helping him and stuff. And this is the thanks I get?

Well. I called him just now to say that I hope he chokes in himself and his loneliness.

Steffi Evenstar · #2 Post by **Steffi Evenstar** » Mon Dec 20, 2004 5:56 pm

boys can be so dumb ... they piss me off as well. i'm sorry, Spikey.

VampD3 · #3 Post by **VampD3** » Mon Dec 20, 2004 6:10 pm

Yeah I'm sorry too!!!

boys and Men are so stupid sometimes!!

Swift · #4 Post by **Swift** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 1:55 am

I'm sorry to hear that.

Spikey · #5 Post by **Spikey** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 1:58 am

Yeah well. He's so stupid. Now he keeps calling me and whining that he's sorry. Well, I won't be fooled, he can suit himself.

Alliance · #6 Post by **Alliance** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 2:07 am

Steffi Evenstar wrote:boys can be so dumb ... they piss me off as well. i'm sorry, Spikey.

Boys aren't dumb... we're just mentally challenged.

Seriously, though, I feel bad for your friend Spikey. That's a bummer. I hope the best for your friend, though, and I'll pray for him.

Spikey · #7 Post by **Spikey** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 3:02 am

Whaaaaat. I don't think you got it. I posted about how my boyfriend cheated on me, while I have been supportive to him and nice to him and all. Don't pray for him, I'm the one who is hurt. Pray for me!

SmoKey · #8 Post by **SmoKey** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 3:38 am

Yes, boys are stupid..

Its US men that are greater!

;)

Gav · #9 Post by **Gav** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 3:42 am

I think "some boys are stupid (pricks) sometimes" is most appropriate.

Bad luck, Spiko. I hope you find happiness elsewhere.

Blackthorne519 · #10 Post by **Blackthorne519** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 5:16 am

People can be selfish. That's what it is. When you find a person that can really put you before themselves, that's special.

What leads people to prick-ish behavior is selfishness.

Bt

Skyshark · #11 Post by **Skyshark** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 5:52 am

Meh, both genders can be stupid when they want to be.

As for backstabbers, well, dealt with a few of those (including one as of late).

Parhelion · #12 Post by **Parhelion** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 6:08 am

His sister died on Friday, and he kissed someone else the next day?

Spikey · #13 Post by **Spikey** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 10:43 am

Yeah. Friday his sister died, Saturday he cheated on me. BAH.

Blackthorne519 · #14 Post by **Blackthorne519** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 5:32 pm

Did he cheat or did he KISS someone else?

Big difference.

Maybe he IS sorry, and he was quite messed up over his sister's death. People do strange and wrong things in times of mourning. Perhaps you should talk to him, try and put aside about 15% of your hurt, and get answers for both of your sakes.

Bt

Angelus3K · #15 Post by **Angelus3K** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 5:56 pm

Blackthorne519 wrote:Did he cheat or did he KISS someone else?

Big difference.

Maybe he IS sorry, and he was quite messed up over his sister's death. People do strange and wrong things in times of mourning. Perhaps you should talk to him, try and put aside about 15% of your hurt, and get answers for both of your sakes.

Bt

I dont know about anybody else but I certainly think kissing is cheating. If Deb kissed someone else I would totally class it as cheating. How can you not?

Vildern · #16 Post by **Vildern** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 6:11 pm

Then, she cheats on you everyday with Kate

(sorry, couldn't resist)

Angelus3K · #17 Post by **Angelus3K** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 6:35 pm

LOL!

So you've decided to come back after a 5 month break! WELCOME!!!

To quote the Lion King "The King.... has returned."

Khaveen · #18 Post by **Khaveen** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 7:23 pm

Vildern wrote:Then, she cheats on you everyday with Kate

(sorry, couldn't resist)

Vildern, omg, VILDERN! Good to see you again! ;)

Spikey · #19 Post by **Spikey** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 7:34 pm

OMG wb Vildern. How nice of you to return in this thread, so personal.

If he stuck his tongue in someone else's mouth while kissing, I consider that cheating. If you're in love with someone else, that's not a thing you do with random people. I certainly don't tolerate my boyfriend doing that.

JWar · #20 Post by **JWar** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 9:26 pm

I have to agree with BT. The intense feelings of unbelief that wash through a person after someone close passes away can make the most stable, trustworthy person do crazy things.

Whatever the case is and whoever gets the blame for this whole affair, it would be in your best interest to talk to him. If only to vent your own frustration and to get closure.

Spikey · #21 Post by **Spikey** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 9:44 pm

When someone close passes away I don't become a cheater, especially not to people who support me. No, I'm sorry, I don't have any words for it, it makes me sick.

Broomie · #22 Post by **Broomie** » Tue Dec 21, 2004 9:51 pm

If it worked out like that you could shag anyone you want.

*Wife walks in while you're in bed with another women*

[Wife] WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON???
[Me] Erm... *sniff* I'm still upset about my uncle.
[Wife] Oh, that's okay, how long you going to be?
[Me] 10 or 15 minutes.

Of course in reality it would probably be a frying pan to the head.

Blackthorne519 · #23 Post by **Blackthorne519** » Wed Dec 22, 2004 12:20 am

No, I don't consider kissing someone else cheating. I consider it a form of betrayal on some level, but it isn't cheating - ditching out on all the committment and morals relationship. Cheating is selling your body over your emotions, cheaply, for a shabby orgasm and self-fufillment, thus circumventing all emotional weight you have developed in a relationship with another person. Kissing someone else represents certain other things, such as perhaps, Selfishness, unhappiness in the current relationship, or distraught emotional reaction.

The circumstances of the event also come into play. If I caught my girlfriend kissing another guy, I'd confront her about it. Because I'm a strong minded, manipulative asshole who uses psychological terror, I'd confront her about it, and probably instill some measure of guilt and emotional and mental insecurity in her. Because that's what one deserves BACK when that's what their actions GIVE. Pouting like a hurt seal does you know good, and it allows another party to gain the upper hand. If after said event, we can move beyond, great. If not, well, that's life.

Always remember, kiddies, guilt and psychological insecurity are your two greatest allies in relationship problems. Everyone is vulnerable at the soul.

Bt

Spikey · #24 Post by **Spikey** » Wed Dec 22, 2004 12:29 am

Cheating, betrayal, I don't care how you call it. I feel cheated and betrayed by him.

He kissed somebody else - my best friend and some of my other friends happened to witness - in a club. It wasn't just a kiss. He has been kissing that guy for one hour straight. We were only seeing each other seriously for a week, and hence, kissing somebody in THIS STAGE of the relationship, the early, in-love kind of stage, IS a big deal. It's not proper to such a thing.

I wasn't talking about confrontation or whatsoever. I'm quite a strong person myself, especially because of what happened to me in earlier relationships. Doesn't make things like this less hurtful though. I did went up to him, I did confront him, made him realise what he had done and what he has lost (me) and he shrunk until there was nothing left of him, making up excuses and begging me for him to take him back.

I told him I thought it was PATHETHIC to use his dead sister for an excuse, and asked what she would have thought of him if she could see him right now. He snapped.

Of course, I won't be fooled by his words and deceitfully handsome face. Maybe I'll mess with his head some more to destroy him completely? Nah, not worth my time. The realisation that he actually gave me the power to do that to him is satisfactory enough.

Blackthorne519 · #25 Post by **Blackthorne519** » Wed Dec 22, 2004 12:35 am

Spikey wrote:Cheating, betrayal, I don't care how you call it. I feel cheated and betrayed by him.

Totally Spikey. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to belittle your situation.

He kissed somebody else - my best friend and some of my other friends happened to witness - in a club. It wasn't just a kiss. He has been kissing that guy for one hour straight. We were only seeing each other seriously for a week, and hence, kissing somebody in THIS STAGE of the relationship, the early, in-love kind of stage, IS a big deal. It's not proper to such a thing.

Yes, though at least it WAS at an early stage in the relationship, not a later one.

I wasn't talking about confrontation or whatsoever. I'm quite a strong person myself, especially because of what happened to me in earlier relationships. Doesn't make things like this less hurtful though. I did went up to him, I did confront him, made him realise what he had done and what he has lost (me) and he shrunk until there was nothing left of him, making up excuses and begging me for him to take him back.

Nice. Heh heh.

I told him I thought it was PATHETHIC to use his dead sister for an excuse, and asked what she would have thought of him if she could see him right now. He snapped.

Maybe pathetic, but it also may be the truth. Make him prove it to you.

Of course, I won't be fooled by his words and deceitfully handsome face. Maybe I'll mess with his head some more to destroy him completely? Nah, not worth my time. The realisation that he actually gave me the power to do that to him is satisfactory enough.

Good point.

Sorry you had to deal with all this, anyway. It totally sucks.

Bt