The things people call mean

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Renodox · #1 Post by **Renodox** » Sat May 28, 2005 2:57 pm

I don't know what my mother and sister's problem is. I'm sure many of you will remember my post about how I found an evil mutated potato that looks like a cat. Well, my mother and sister know full well that I believe a cat that they know (and dislike) is this potato. Anyway, a couple days ago I told about a fantasy I've held for a while and they said it was cruel and mean and never wanted to hear it again! Now after reading this, tell me if it's so cruel that you'd never want to hear it again:

As the song O Fortuna starts playing I stand over an army of robots, each that looks exactly like me. I give a speech of how we've tolerated the enemey for too long and that for too long she has lived in comfort. It is time to shatter that feeling of security! Then I send them on their way. The army marches down the road in perfect unison so that their foot step makes one loud sound every time they move.

Now this scene goes from scenes of my army to scenes of the "cat" that is at first asleep but wakes up and is apparently worried because she wakes up and lookes around. Finally, she jumps up to a windowsill.

When the song gets more intense she is suddenly greeted by one of the robots at the window and she runs for her favorite hiding place. But much to her surprise and horror one of my robots is there waiting for her! She quickly darts to another of her favorite hiding places with the same result. In fact, all her hiding places are covered! More and more of my robots flood in chasing after her, always keeping the perfect step.

As the song finishes she is surrounded by an army so vast and thick that she can't even rush past thier legs. The army converges. Stricken with fear she meows out in vein for help. Finally, the army stops and reaches down to grab her. Trembling with fear she stoops into a sitting position and just before they can touch her, she faints.

Jafar · #2 Post by **Jafar** » Sat May 28, 2005 3:41 pm

You still think a poor, innocent kitty is really a mutated potato monster? Don't do crugs, dude.

FatherGhostface · #3 Post by **FatherGhostface** » Sat May 28, 2005 3:53 pm

Shaaaaaaah-you know what? Uh-uh!

Renodox · #4 Post by **Renodox** » Sat May 28, 2005 4:36 pm

Geez, you act like I hurt her. Anyway, here's a story that explains more about it:

You see, years ago, I had left two potatoes in the pantry for MUCH too long. When I found them they had five roots each. Four of the roots had been tightly curled and were placed like the legs of a quadraped, the fifth one was straight and looked like a tail. They were covered with mold that was grey with black stripes and each had a head with parts that looked something like eyes and ears. I threw them into the outside trashcans of course.

Later that night, I heard sounds outside and went to investigate. The sound was comming from the trash. As soon I as I approached the trashcans two grey tabby cats jumped and satarted running away. One of them ran past me. I was so startled I tripped and flaily madly (I even tipped the trashcan a bit) I fell over. I hit the ground hard and felt somethign give way under my back.

I raised my head and saw that the other "cat" had gone over the fence and was staring at me intently with glowing green eyes. It ran away before I could get back up. I turned around and looked for the cat that ran past me but it was nowhere to be seen. Carefully, I stood up and checked to see what I landed on. I found nothing, except for the mashed remains of a potato. I searched the trashcan but the potatoes were nowhere to be found.

I'm sure that this cat that I've met is the second mutated potato. She has the same glowing green eyes and in a picture of her one eye is brown and one is green. Only something with plant origins would have these eye colors!

Besides, it's just a fanatasy and it works great with the song O Fortuna!

Ghost_Rider · #5 Post by **Ghost_Rider** » Sat May 28, 2005 5:56 pm

I don't know, never heard of cats being shape-shifters. Even if they were - why would they want to change into a potato?

#6 Post by **navynuke04** » Sat May 28, 2005 7:58 pm

What I want to know is, what is the deal with people and potato's on this forum???

Jafar · #7 Post by **Jafar** » Sat May 28, 2005 8:01 pm

It probably can be traced to Renodox's childhood when he never got that Mr.Potato head he wanted...

#8 Post by **Erpy** » Sat May 28, 2005 8:34 pm

Tell me about it. While I was in the US, even AGD1 seemed inclined to bring up the potato-subject from time to time. :rolleyes

FatherGhostface · #9 Post by **FatherGhostface** » Sat May 28, 2005 9:27 pm

What is it with people and potatoes?

Blackthorne519 · #10 Post by **Blackthorne519** » Sat May 28, 2005 11:32 pm

Potatoes are tasty, but this thread is wacked-out, man.

Bt

Renodox · #11 Post by **Renodox** » Sun May 29, 2005 12:26 am

I don't know, never heard of cats being shape-shifters. Even if they were - why would they want to change into a potato?

The cats didn't become potatoes, the potatoes became cats.

As for some images take a look at this:

http://www.collingridge.net/richard/ny2 ... potato.jpg A potato in stage three mutation. The roots have yet to have grown properly and the ears have not yet sprouted. Grey fungus which will eventually become its fur will start to grow in stage four.

http://home.earthlink.net/~jcanimalshel ... ringle.JPG A fully mutated potato kept in captivity. The eye coloration is the result of shining pure white light into its eyes. The brown and green colors indicate the plant origin.

http://www.acm.ndsu.nodak.edu/~ebrun/potato/potato.html A website referring to a killer potato. While mutation had not fully occured its manevolent behavior sprouted.

Klytos · #12 Post by **Klytos** » Sun May 29, 2005 3:11 am

Potatos are great when boiled up, cut into quarters and eaten with melted cheese and butter. Mmmmmmmmm. Yummy!

Jafar · #13 Post by **Jafar** » Sun May 29, 2005 8:00 am

FatherGhostface wrote:What is it with people and potatoes?

Even he can't solve the potato riddle of life!!!

Amayirot Akago · #14 Post by **Amayirot Akago** » Sun May 29, 2005 1:04 pm

Po-ta-toes!

Da_elf · #15 Post by **Da_elf** » Mon May 30, 2005 1:50 pm

i think i have the answer. potatoes are used in making moon-shine. so as a kid he probable had a bad batch of moon-shine and the fumes are still messing with him

Ghost_Rider · #16 Post by **Ghost_Rider** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 1:05 am

Interesting theory, you might be onto something there! That stuff was possibly cheaper than milk, and so it was moonshine in the baby bottle instead.

Renodox · #17 Post by **Renodox** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 4:50 am

I didn't drink from bottles as a baby. I'd gag.

Anyway, I still want to know what you think about the fantasy.

Ghost_Rider · #18 Post by **Ghost_Rider** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 1:12 am

Good point about the moonshine - babies are pretty fussy and aren't afraid to not ingest what they don't like.

Well, I think the fantasy is odd. Sounds like one of those really weird cartoons where it just doesn't really make sense.

PotatoSlayer · #19 Post by **PotatoSlayer** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 1:43 am

This looks like a job for.....me!

Quest For Glory Fan · #20 Post by **Quest For Glory Fan** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:16 am

DAMNIT you beat me, I was thinking about thistopic in school today and I thought when I get home I'm gonna post "Potato Slayer's name brings a new meaning now" but nope I can't believe no one thought of it before though

Klytos · #21 Post by **Klytos** » Mon Jun 06, 2005 10:32 am

Renodox I thought about this today, you should write up a treatment and make a good game out of it. Would be worth looking into.

The things people call mean

The things people call mean

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